I’m never gonna dance again. Guilty feet have got no rhythm! Though it’s easy to pretend, I know you’re not a foooool…
Me: Matty, TURN OFF YOUR ALARM before Careless Whisper becomes Homicidal Whisper. Day 1 of our vacation (I never count travel days) I was ready to go by 7:30. Unfortunately, my roommates did not feel the same so it took considerable hustling to get them out the door by 8:00. We were enjoying the balmy air of our air conditioned room, but then I opened the door. Suffocation. Who could think about eating with this kind of heat and humidity?
Matty’s most anticipated part of this trip was the food. The kid is like a bottomless pit.
Matty: Refried beans and chicken tacos at a breakfast buffet. Glory. This is going to be an epic week.
Me: You are sitting downwind at the beach.
Confession: I am not a huge beach person. I am a do things, explore new places, immerse myself in a new culture kind of person. Not to mention that my skin hates the sun so I have to time my forays out from beneath an umbrella and into the ocean unless I want to look like a lobster. Somehow on the first day, in spite of having SPF 70+ shellacked on every visible millimeter of skin every half hour, I managed to get the beginnings of a burn. Ok, time to be proactive. When we got back to the room I grabbed the green bottle of aloe vera and got to work.
Me: This doesn’t smell like aloe vera…wait, why is this lathering?…You have got to be ki—-! STINK!! Rebekah: What?! WHAT?! Are you okay? Me: Just peachy. I slathered myself with bathing suit cleaner instead of aloe vera. Rebekah: [laughing like a hyena] Do you have sunstroke? Me: The bottle was green! Aloe vera is green…Stop laughing. STOP. IT.